Is it just me or is the world on fire?

Stumbled upon this review: Joker’s Wild? and I find it speaks to me. In a few short paragraphs, the author has captured the soul of the issue, expanded it to envelop our current reality, and explained it in such a manner that she has given it life and made me perk up and pay attention…because I understand what she is trying to convey and she does so in such a manner that the words take on an essence of their own, filling in the empty spaces within the reality around us, becoming what we are living. Sometimes words can be touched, felt…they can wrap around your soul in an intricate blanket.

I think I may need to put this movie on my list of Needful Things, maybe?

“When you see your brother or your sister suffering, you must not stay silent.”

– Kabede Bimro, Red Sea Diving Resort

I will be running different fundraisers through mid-November to collect funds for our homeless community. These funds are earmarked for the Lee Homeless Coalition in Fort Myers, FL, to help fund the needs of our homeless community this Holiday Season. Every little bit helps. Thank you in advance: Hope for the Homeless

Social Captioning

Andrea's Buzzing About:

Hubby & I were taking a walk down the neighborhood park pathway. After several “hundred-year-advent floods” that happened within the same decade, the diverse planning committees finally realised that the streamway areas will flood and that it’s easier to work with nature, therefore, they shouldn’t allow building permits in these zones. Instead, they created public use areas that can more-or-less withstand periodic flooding, turning them into neighborhood parks with extensive pathways connecting them like green arteries snaking across the county. The pathway is tarmacked, following the winding curves of the steam, and nicely shaded. Bicyclists, rollerbladers, pedestrians, children seeking adventure, and dog-walkers all use these trails.

Shade also means increased cover, so what one gains in relief from sun exposure one loses in breezes to cool the skin and disperse personal clouds of gnats. I keep forgetting how this obnoxious part of summer affects me personally. Unless most people, I…

View original post 1,311 more words

Is it CC?

I love CC. Some days are harder than others when it comes to listening and making sense of what is being said.

Andrea's Buzzing About:

Description: The Closed Captioning symbol, a black frame in a horizontal rectangle, with a white television screen shape inside, displaying a pair of letter Cs.

This icon is used in North America to denote television programming that carried the accessory closed captioning signal. (I like to give artists credit, so I’ll mention that it was designed by Jack Foley, a graphics designer for that closed captioning pioneer, public television station WGBH of Boston, Massachusetts.) I’m pleased to see this icon on video boxes or in a television guide by a show listing, because it means the program is captioned, i.e. subtitled. Captions aren’t exactly the same as subtitles, although the two terms are often used interchangeably. Captions also describe other important auditory information, such as the type of background mood music, that a phone is ringing, there’s a knock on the door, or putting a musical quarter-note symbol by the…

View original post 1,321 more words

Recess: Sunday Funnies

Andrea's Buzzing About:

Recess means we take a break and play; it’s important to do that once in a while.

Today I have a cartoon from today’s funny pages, “Pearls Before Swine” by Stephen Pastis. This one made it to our refrigerator. Everyone has difficulties understanding voice-mail messages once in a while. Those of us with auditory processing problems or hearing problems have difficulties understanding voice-mail messages all the time. We dread listening to voice-mail messages, and hate having to listen to them repeatedly to try and figure out what someone is telling us.

(Description of cartoon: This is a seven-panel cartoon of a pig and a rat standing by a table with a telephone message recording machine. In the first panel, Rat is listening to a recorded message, with pencil poised over a notepad; the recorded message says, “…and so … if you just … uh… meet me … like … uhh…

View original post 211 more words

Everything…and nothing at all

Who am I? I am everything…and nothing at all. I am one whose doctor refused to name for the love of me, more’s the pity…or maybe not. Who even knows what is best and what is not in this world where chaos reins and fairy tales are the hope of the masses? I am and that is enough in and of itself. What am I? Something between heaven and hell, between shadows and light. I am Frankenstein, put together of bits and pieces picked up along the road called life, a kaleidoscope of colors borrowed from those I have come into contact with, flavored by experiences that make me smile each time I close my eyes, flooding my synapses with adrenaline and suffusing my senses with joy and bonhomie recalling moments frozen in a time and place that will never be again. One can never go home again, after all. And that is as it should be.

Who am I? A dreamer, a cynic, a lover, a fighter, a creature that Loves the light almost as much as she loves the dark and the candlelight in which she sits alone and ponders whenever she is allowed to escape the world and retreat to the safety of her own mind. There are so many lovely songs, poems, thought-provoking pieces, the most thought-provoking usually obscure…anyway, from time to time, I will be adding these because they speak to me, to a part of me that comes out in these diaries. Sometimes I will go back and edit, adding commentaries…and sometimes I won’t, as the mood suits me.
Sometimes, they may seem a disjointed bunch, as I travel from place to place to place…times untold, but they make sense to me…And that is all that matters.

As I slowly began writing again after years of hiding, I began to experiment with different areas in which to place my soul, the real and the imagined, the shadows and the light. Even that which is imagination is real to me in the moment that it comes to be within my mind’s eye until the moment it is birthed into words and then I am once again set free.

drow

I was definitely not seventeen. My summer spanned the
course of several years. But the memories, those years…
that lifetime. They endure.
I still dream and…in dreaming…remember those lovely,
bittersweet memories that I keep locked away in the
darkest recesses of my soul. Now, as an older woman, I
look back at the futility of hanging on in spite of all I
knew and all the innocence I sold cheaply, despite my
beliefs…and yet, beyond the shadow of a doubt, I know
this:
I would do it all over again.
For in following the path I did, I ended up where I am now
and the memories, the heartbreak, the regrets, they just
make me richer and more able to love and forgive and
accept than I ever was before. Love…charity…they are
truly one and the same. And they really do beareth all
things for they have no other choice. Even when one walks
away in despair, never again to turn back, the love
endures…forever, maybe not in the same form, because in
walking away it is burned at the seams and charred into a
new form, but enduring nonetheless.

Of Strawberry Wine and Other Things…

To Be Me

An upswing of emotions, a manic high brought about by adrenaline, to be swept away and enveloped in heart-wrenching emotions so strong as to burst you at the seams if only you will let yourself go…this is why some rare ones love being who they are so much…
and why others might be uncomfortable, as well, and none to blame.
At my best, I am alive, a wire, the world bright colors and silver linings greet me at every turn. Yet I’ve dipped my toes within darker regions, inky pits of despair. Sometimes, I have willingly lowered myself into the tar pits of the nether regions just to feel what there is to feel. I know the heights that can be reached and have tasted a fleeting bitter drop of despair, yet never enough for it to be as bad as it can get for some…I am blessed. Blessed to be me, to be able to reach for heights untold and to be able to avoid the maelstrom of despair that can enfold those unfortunate enough to own the two opposite ends of the spectrum.
How bizarre, to be able to feel and yet be able withdraw into the relative safe void that hides within my soul. I would not change a thing. To live, to sink my teeth within this life and suck the sweet juices dripping down my fingers…what a blessing to be me!

~ Maelstrom143

Loneliness…revisited

it is so hard for me these days to think, to speak, to try
to be myself and not to cry out in despair thinking that
somewhere out there I lost my way and failed to find that
one true friend that i was meant to spare from a life of
search and longing and affairs…
i have someone yet I don’t; i cry out to him and he
ignores my pleas asking that i be exactly what he wants
from me, complaining when i am and even when i am not…
so dark and cold; sheer despair envelops my world and
chills
my soul and i still cry out to the night wondering where i
possibly went wrong.
i turn to friends to bare my soul when i should have that
one true love to turn my face toward and yet i don’t…
so afraid of the rebukes and the hatred building in my
inner fort; anger and restraint and a growing lack of
trust for one who should be all to me and yet is not…
it used to be i thought he was the one; my one true
friend, the best of me; yet, he is not…
he locks his soul away, preferring to keep his own counsel
and remain aloof and safe.
mayhap i fooled myself trying to think he was the one, for
no responding voice echoes my questing heart and my
loneliness augments, sending me reeling back in time to a
time when i locked myself away
only darkness echoes back my request for a kindred heart
in whose light to bask in and the light of day slowly
bleeds away, leaving me lying bleeding, broken, and afraid,
not of being alone but of being lonely forevermore.

~ Maelstrom143

Mneme Uncovered

I am seeming to enjoy this diary. it has been so very long
since I was able to express all my wild and crazy thoughts
quite so openly and unafraid of censure.
of course, i have to close my eyes and ignore everything
i ever knew about proper spelling/writing/etc and just flow,
but it sure beats the heck out of the alternative:
going completely and totally insane.
i have tried being me in front of family and friends but
truly it is too hard for most to really know me and be
able to accept the fact that i can be quite volatile and blunt
but i mean no harm and no foul i just am and it is
so very nice to be able to just let it all hang out and
not have everyone judging me as mean or ugly just because
i like to argue with the tv and pass judgment on
inconsequential fictitious tv/movie characters who will
never know or care that i insulted them or wished them
harm because they are not real. i don’t do it to real
people and that is what really counts, i think.
i do not think i am such a bad person
for being me, but am so sick and tired of being wrongly
interpreted. anyway, i am what i am and i cannot change my
soul just to please those around me, so i will just hide
out and let them see whatever it is makes them
happy…after all, nothing lasts forever…one day i will
be free to be me in places where they will see me if just
for a day or just for a week and then i’ll be gone, off to
greener lands or maybe just newer…never to be seen again.

~ Maelstrom143

Loneliness

it is so hard for me these days to think, to speak, to try 
to be myself and not to cry out in despair thinking that 
somewhere out there I lost my way and failed to find that 
one true friend that i was meant to spare from a life of 
search and longing and affairs...
i have someone yet I don't; i cry out to him and he 
ignores my pleas asking that i be exactly what he wants 
from me, complaining when i am and even when i am not...
so dark and cold; sheer despair envelops my world and 
chills 
my soul and i still cry out to the night wondering where i 
possibly went wrong.
i turn to friends to bare my soul when i should have that 
one true love to turn my face toward and yet i don't...
so afraid of the rebukes and the hatred building in my 
inner fort; anger and restraint and a growing lack of 
trust for one who should be all to me and yet is not...
it used to be i thought he was the one; my one true 
friend, the best of me; yet, he is not...
he locks his soul away, preferring to keep his own counsel 
and remain aloof and safe.
mayhap i fooled myself trying to think he was the one, for 
no responding voice echoes my questing heart and my 
loneliness augments, sending me reeling back in time to a 
time when i locked myself away
only darkness echoes back my request for a kindred heart 
in whose light to bask in and the light of day slowly 
bleeds away, leaving me lying bleeding, broken, and afraid,
not of being alone but of being lonely forevermore.

~ Maelstrom143